Sunday, October 10, 2010


The past week has been crazy, I found out that the woman who was nearly my grandma  died last week, so this threw me mentally. Physically I am fine, and I have continued with my planed program with food & exercise, Mentally well.... you might know... losing a loved one SUCKS big time. Pom is my step fathers mother, and I have known her since I was 12, she welcomed me into her family & her heart as if I was really her grandchild.
It is hard, I want to be REALLY upset, but part of me feels like I have to be strong. I am a cry’er from way back, I hate any confrontation and I cry at any given issue.... it is not a good trait, and one that I struggle to control (particularly in workplace performance conversations, or tense discussions with people).
I am not sure how I will get through the funeral, I know I will cry – but it is ok, I am allowed to grieve... what I don’t know how to deal with is missing the monthly phone calls with this lady, or the short visits for coffee when I was in Sydney. I know that at times I hated having to visit, it was boring, and I really didn’t care to hear what she said at times, but you know now looking back I value each and every interaction I had with Pom.
I have mentioned my amazing mother a few times, but it is because of her that I have such close relationships with my family. She is the one that reminded me to visit, that reminded me to call & simply say hello... all those 10 minute phone calls whilst I was driving home from work meant so much to Pom, and now also to me... I will miss making them.
Pom was an amazing woman, a state netballer in her youth, mother of 3, grandmother  to 1 (well and me!) and beloved wife of over 50 years.
I will miss her........

1 comment:

  1. Hugs Sara <3

    I really dont have any words for you right now, I think you said it yourself, you need to grieve and its okay to cry (perfectly natural infact). Just give yourself the space and time and do whats right for you.

    will be thinking of you xx I'm always here if you want to chat or vent